For all the scrapes they bandage, the big dongs they suck, the lunches they make, the cucumbers they shove up their butts, the lessons they teach, the twats and assholes they let us fuck, the noses they wipe, the cum that they swallow, the diapers they change, the stories they read, the bazookas they let us squeeze and suck on, the tears they wipe away and the pure delight they bring to fathers around the globe, our American Nannies are invaluable parts of our families. What would we do without them?